“What you perceive as most missing (void) in your life therefore becomes what you perceive as most important (value)” Dr John Demartini.
Sitting across from my eldest sister, a long and stressful day had taken us captive. While avoiding topics pertaining to work and studies, we started discussing the importance of values; exchanging our ideas of personal values; figuring out what our values are- what my values are.
“I don’t have values” – I remember mumbling to myself with sadness and utter shock. Everyone should have values, it guides our behaviour and reinforces certain mental processes, right? If we don’t consciously choose our personal values then we are living our lives according to generic values – values we may not even like.
It wasn’t after my sister quoted Dr John Demartini did I realise that values play an important role in living a conscious life; that the process of figuring out your values is not a simple task. Demartini believes the importance of examining your past and present to find the voids that make up you life; in particular to choose three voids to inspire the choice of values. He holds that everything we say, think, and do should be incongruent to those three values. We live more conscious and balanced lives this way.
Choosing the right values changed my life:
Before, I used to make choices that suited my mood and who the behaviour was directed towards. I had no conscious values that directed my life.
Today, I always try to base my life’s choices against three values – tranquillity, positivity, and empathy. Choosing the right values motivates me to want to live in accordance to them because without those values my life’s tank is at its emptiest. You need to choose values that fill the missing pieces to make up your life’s puzzle. The right values guide my thinking and position my thoughts, speech, and behaviour in such a way that I find myself living consciously. If ever I feel unhappy, I know I am dismissing my values. I have become a more assured person who finds it easier to make the right decisions.
I am a human with the freedom to choose and live consciously; to create my own reality and life’s path – sometimes I have to remind myself.
Desray Nay 